7 Women Share What It'S Like To Go Down On A Woman For The First Time
You're dating an amazing woman. You've held hands, and even kissed. But only one daunting task remains...the whole mouth-meets-vagina thing. ,>
If you've never gone down on a woman before, it's easy to be intimidated. ,>But rest assured, you're far from alone in your nervousness. And that's okay! Reality is, it's probably going to be awkward, just like any first-time sexual encounter. You’re not going to be some wanton oral sex goddess right off the bat when you have zero experience, after all.
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But just go for it! You’ll be glad you did. If you’re curious what it might be like, we’ve got some very savvy ladies here to tell you about their experiences going down on a woman for the first time.
'It didn't feel different than having sex with men'
"I had just come out as bi and wasn't sure what to expect. I had heard stories from some women like, ‘Going down on a woman made me realize this is how sex is supposed to be,’ and from others who were like, ‘Yeah, not for me after all.’ I very much enjoyed it but to be honest it didn't feel all that different from having sex with men. I enjoyed it equally and it just felt like sex. Bisexuality confirmed." —Sophie, 30
'It was such an ego boost'
"Going down on a woman for the first time wasn't scary at all, because I'd had sex with women before, and I'd even been with the woman before, using hands and toys occasionally. It was definitely something I wasn't ready for until I'd kind of come to terms with my own vagina, and not feeling weird about it.
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"When I was younger and less accepting of myself and my sexuality, I was a little squeamish about it, but once I opened up and came to terms with it, it felt familiar and nice, and responding to the woman was so sexy and such an ego boost that I got really into it." —Sarah, 25
'I had no idea what I was doing'
"I wasn’t worried about, but probably should have been. I hadn’t been with anyone before, sexually. I was around 17. I had no clue what I was doing. I actually started fingering her pretty aggressively. I was trying to be a dick, I think? She had to stop me. I was super embarrassed. But somehow she continued dating me for three months so, I guess that’s something. I’ve for sure gotten better with time." —Max, 22
'I mimicked what I like'
"I'd had sex with a LOT of guys in the past, but never women. I felt more self-conscious around women. Men are pretty straightforward, but a woman is more complicated. I guess I also want to please women and seek their approval more than guys. The first time was really scary, but I just tried to mimic what I like when people go down on me. The whole time I was super nervous. After that experience, I started asking women what they wanted me to do or what they liked. That improved my game a lot." —Claire, 28
'It confirmed my sexuality'
"I was wrapped up in the taste and smell of a woman. I thought I was bisexual, but after I put my face in a woman’s vulva it was like, ‘Nope. Def gay.’" —Molly, 26
'It was a hot mess'
"I think I was trying to do too much at once. I was using my fingers, tongue, lips, everything. I don’t think she had an orgasm. Okay, I know she didn’t. We started doing other stuff instead. I asked friends about it later and now have a new life motto: Just keep your tongue on her clit and everything will be fine." —Bri, 23
'Watching a girl come was so satisfying'
"The first time I went down on a girl, I was super drunk. She was a girl that I met on Tinder, and earlier that evening I went out to a bar with her—so the fact that I ended up back at her place wasn’t all that surprising. She was on her period, but was wearing a tampon, so she told me I could still go down on her clit. I remember drunkenly slurring, ‘I KNOW the female anatomy, okay? I’ve had it my WHOLE life!’ I never explicitly told her it was my first time with a girl, but that statement might have given it away.
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"I have to say—watching a girl come was the most satisfying feeling. When guys come, they make weird faces and kind of flop around; when girls come, they sort of vibrate, and look like goddesses. I was definitely glad I did it, because I had been questioning—so that validated for me that my girl crushing was legit." —Mara, 26
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in Chicago. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.