Bruno Mars Would Like You To Know: He’s Had Sex
Late Thursday evening, Bruno Mars released a new track, "Versace on the Floor." Maybe it's because it's Friday, but two GQ editors found themselves feeling feelings about it.
Chris Gayomali (News and Culture Editor): At this point in his career, Bruno Mars is basically a walking “Remember the ‘90s” BuzzFeed listicle. And the weird thing is he pulls it off! This new “Versace on the Floor” track toes the line between legitimate fuckjam and an old Shanice song that wouldn’t have sounded out of place on the original 90210 soundtrack. It’s sponcon done right.
Max Berlinger (Senior Style Editor): First, can I just say that this is not at all what I expected from Bruno? A title like “Versace on the Floor” sounds like a total upbeat dance hit, so just imagine my surprise when it was like the ultimate slow-jam throwback. I guess I thought he meant the dance floor, but that is not at all what he meant. (Spoiler alert: He meant taking your clothes off and getting nekkid wit chu, ladies.)
Chris: In case it isn’t clear, Bruno Mars has SEX and wants us to know it. But you're right. His recent hot streak is a little unexpected; it’s like “Uptown Funk” gave him a clear (and probably data-driven) career path: nostalgic bangers only. Am I wrong?
Max: No, you’re absolutely right. I mean, this is the aural equivalent of what we’re seeing in the fashion space: a return to these early '90s trends. Look at Urban Outfitters and their embrace of FILA, Tommy Hilfiger logo gear, and Nautica! And it lines up perfectly with the 20-year trend loop that fashion tends to abide by. I think it’s interesting that there’s no real wink-wink energy here, it’s just smooth R&B. Will young people get it? I don’t know ‘cause I’m old. But I do know that as someone in their [cough cough] 30s, this is striking a chord with me. This is pure Boyz II Men realness and I don’t mind it!
Chris: He’s such an unrepentant cheeseball but I kind of love him for it. This is a song moms will love at debuts until the end of time. Which I guess brings us to a weird question: Did a switch just flip? Is Bruno Mars having his “Teenage Dream” moment? Do we, um, love him now?
Max: After this year with all the weirdo, oftentimes labored, concept albums (Kanye, Frank, Bey, Gaga, et al.), I’m glad someone is owning the space of nostalgia and lightheartedness. An R&B song about sex? In 2016 that’s downright sweet, in its own way. And I’m by no means the first person to point out that this year royally sucks. I’m happy to have a little slow jam transport me back and distract me for a few minutes.