Sex Will Be Obsolete By 2030 Because Of Netflix, According To One Lone Scientist
Editor's note: After we published this story, David Spiefelhalter tweeted at the author to let her know that he was just joshin’ about the future of your sex life being doomed (though the story’s quotes are still accurate). Good one, Spiefelhalter!
Got a Game of Thrones obsession? Well, your sex life is effed, according to one scientist in the U.K.
David Spiegelhalter, a professor and statistician at Cambridge University, who happens to be very concerned about how often you're getting some, suggests that TV is causing couples to have less sex.
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He cites declining nooky rates over the last 30 years to support his theory. In 1990, couples had sex around five times a month. But now, they have sex just three times a month—a 40 percent decrease.
“I think it’s the box set, Netflix. ‘OMG I’ve got to watch the entire second series of Game of Thrones,’” Spiegelhalter said during a public talk, per The Telegraph.
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According to Spiegelhalter, constantly being connected to our phones and the TV is causing people to get it on less often “compared to just a few years ago when TV closed down at 10:30 p.m., or whatever.” And, he says, if this continues, couples won’t be having sex at all by the year 2030.
So, there are a few things that seem off with this theory. First, TV was around in 1990, which kind of makes his premise flawed from the start. Sure, we didn’t have Netflix, but we did have Full House, Cheers, and The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, as well as a wide assortment of VHS tapes that you either owned or could pick up from your local Blockbuster (may they rest in peace).
This reasoning also assumes that if you aren't watching TV, you’re boinking, which is like saying that sex is what we do when we’re not doing pretty much anything else. Also, GoT is hot AF and probably causes couples to have more sex, not less. And if you want to get technical, it's on HBO, not Netflix.
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Finally, we highly doubt people will end up having no sex at all. We’re pretty sure orgasms trump TV on most occasions. Oh, and there’s a little thing called “DVR” that allows you to take a timeout, get some action, and still not miss a thing on your favorite show. Praise technology.
To check, though, we asked readers on Twitter if they think TV is getting in the way of their sex life.
When asked if they’ve ever chosen TV over sex, the majority (51 percent) said nope, while 32 percent said yes. The rest weren’t sure.
The same was true for the question “Do you think TV is getting in the way of your sex life?” 66 percent said no.
So, David Spiegelhalter, why don't you add that to your Netflix queue and watch it.
All gifs courstesy of giphy.com.