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10 Women Share The "Unsexy" Ways They Orgasm

When you think about sex in the abstract, you probably envision yourself floating in a fluffy white cloud of bed sheets, busting out perfectly executed orgasms left and right in sheer and utter ecstasy. But take a minute to really think about what happens in bed.

Sure, that whole fluffy cloud thing may happen once in a blue moon, but it can also get reeeal awkward up in there—and that's because reaching the big O can be tricky. And, risking understatement, it's not always a glamorous ride along the way—just check out these "unsexy" (and somewhat hilarious) ways these women get off. But remember: Confidence is the sexiest thing of all, so if you own these moves, then, um, what's the problem again?

The Silent Night
"After we have sex in missionary or whatever else for a little bit, I have to get on top, and lie completely horizontally on my guy's stomach. Then, I basically have to just grind on top of him in a small circle in silence until I climax—it's so anti-climactic! No screaming, no dramatic butt swivels, no nothing. It’s like I'm a silent Buddha and all of the sudden I reach the golden light, with no documented ecstasy in between." —Jessie, 29

The Pillow Thing
"You know how everyone always says it can be good to put a pillow under butt to orgasm? Yeah, I have to do that. But I always feel so unsexy, because we'll be going at it, and then I just have to stop mid-booty and rearrange the bedding area until it's perfectly suited to my needs. Who am I, a grandma?" —Angie, 31

The Still Thrill
"Sometimes, when I feel like I'm close, I have to hold my breath. It's like I'm afraid of disturbing it and scaring it away, so I try to be as motionless as possible. Then when I finally do orgasm, I'm so out of breath that I'm panting like a wolfhound." —Chloe, 28

The Bathroom Blunder
"I really like to have sex in the bathroom with my boyfriend. It usually happens randomly, like when we're brushing our teeth or something, and he just picks me up and puts my butt on the sink and we hop to it. But the thing is, I've only ever reached orgasm when I'm on the edge of the sink and I’m gripping the handle of the cabinet next to me with my right hand so I don't slip. It’s a totally awkward position—one hand on the cabinet and the other on him—and there’s a mirror in there so I can see how funny I look. But it works every time!"  —Bree, 27

MORE: 14 Things Every Woman Has Thought During Sex

The Friction Fail
"I don't know why, but I require serious friction and pressure to orgasm. So what usually needs to be done is my boyfriend has to press the heel of his palm down pretty hard on my clitoris, and move it back and forth really really fast. Then, at the same time, I have to push my body against his to create unbelievable amounts of pressure. It can feel like a chore sometimes, all this work, but it’s always worth it for sure!” —Nicole, 34

The Spoon Boon
"My boyfriend loves to spoon me and then start having sex with me from behind. Cute, in theory, but the problem is I can hardly ever keep his penis inside me—it's such an awkward angle! So what I do is I adjust myself so I'm really hunched over, almost curled up in a c-shaped ball, and I just stick my butt straight back into his goods. One time I thought about what we would look like from an aerial perspective and I pretty much laughed out loud. Why is sex so awkward sometimes?" —Allie, 29

The Shoulder Pad
"When my boyfriend is on top, I like to put the bottoms of my feet on his shoulders, so he basically has to push his body down to stay on top of me. It's a great move, and it always make me orgasm, but it definitely starts to feel awkward when my feet have been up there for a little bit. And sometimes, my feet start to slip, and I have to grip him around his neck extra hard to get back on track—such acrobatics!" —Brittany, 28

MORE: 17 Weird, Awkward, Uncomfortable Things That Can Happen During Sex 

The C Job
"For me, it only happens when my clitoris is seriously involved. To make that happen, I'll have my boyfriend thrust pretty slowly and then I'll get down there with my hands and use all five fingers to rub my clitoris at the same time. It can sometimes feel crowded in there, what with his penis and my fingers, but it's totally worth it in the end!" —Marnie, 28 

The Shower Stall
"I can't ever orgasm during shower sex, probably because it's so slippery and awkward in there. So sometimes my boyfriend and I start, but then we have to rush out and finish on the floor. It's funny because we're sopping wet and my hair is all disheveled! But then we just hop back in after to rinse off. Definitely makes the bathroom a mess though!" —Ellie, 26

The Coconut Crush
"I can orgasm during regular sex, don't get me wrong, but I find that my orgasms are extra great when I use coconut oil. My partner and I spread it all over each other, and something about the slipperiness plus the exotic smell really puts me over the edge. The problem, though, is that it's actually really messy. We end up getting oil all over our sheets and on random pieces of furniture that we accidentally touch before we shower off. Plus, we end up sliding around all over the place, so I feel very uncoordinated. But even though it's not super graceful, the orgasm is amazing!" —Celia, 30

MORE: 10 Wild, Crazy, WTF Sex Positions You've Never Heard Of—and Have to Try

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