How To Get Really Comfortable In Your Body For Sex
The clitoris, the clitoris, the clitoris. THE CLITORIS! I will say it until I'm blue in the face: For anyone lucky to have one, the clitoris reigns supreme. And yet while clitoral stimulation is usually a sure bet when it comes to orgasm, there is more to truly electrifying sex than a general knowledge of sexual anatomy.
As a certified sex coach, what I often see with my clients is an inability to get out of their heads long enough to focus. This is a shame, because your mind is your biggest sex organ. It plays a huge role in arousal and desire—a bigger role than we ever give it credit for.
Getting into your body during sex takes patience, practice, more practice, and, crucially, a willingness to expand your comfort zone. Here is how you get out of your busy, busy mind and into your body for better sex.
1. Don’t forget to breathe
Oftentimes you’ll find yourself focusing incredibly hard in the middle of sex, especially when you’re on top or in a dominant position. When we’re straining ourselves in any way, we automatically forget to breathe, tense up our muscles, and focus every ounce of energy we have on the task we’re performing. This is, unfortunately, not a great way to stay connected to your body during sex.
2. Give yourself regular positive affirmations
We tend to get bogged down in a cycle of negative self-talk. We tell ourselves we’re not good enough, question our credibility at work or in bed, and wonder if we’re physically attractive. Overstreet says getting out this habit is hugely important to being present during sex.
3. Give meditation a try
Meditation is a great way to get focused in your everyday life, but it’s also beneficial for sex. Practicing mindfulness and taking time away from your hectic schedule to center your thoughts will reap benefits in the bedroom. It’s about becoming aware of yourself and your body.
4. Work on truthful communication with your partner
Communication with your partner is not only important for making your relationship stronger, but for helping you feel present and comfortable in bed. Being able to openly and honestly share your needs and feelings helps you establish trust. If you don’t trust the person you’re having sex with, you will feel distracted and on edge, and never fully enjoy the sex.