How Much Sex Is Enough Sex For A Happy Marriage?
In the past 5 years I have often expressed my frustration at how little research is available about basic sexual issues. One of my pet peeves is that there is no data available on the effect that sex may (or may not) have on long term relationships. That is, does regular sex improve a marriage or not? It would seem to us professionals that it would make a difference, and anecdotally (that is from the stories I get from my patients) it appears so, but I learned long ago to be wary of making sweeping generalizations from what I see in my office.
Today, the PA from our staff forwarded this article to me. Eureka! Finally, someone has done serious research using a data base of over 25,000. And guess what they found?
“…when the researchers crunched the numbers to find out if there’s an upper limit to improving well-being through sex, they found that the happiness maxed out at sex about once a week.” That is… if you are having sex less than once a week, having more frequent sex will make you happier. After that, the happiness level peters out. Now I need to hazard readers. This is an average. That means that some people need more and some people need less to make them happy. And no “one size (or frequency) fits all.”
But what made me really feel good was that for years I have been telling people (without research to back me up) that I thought that most couples are happiest when they are having sex 1-2 times a week. And that problems seem to develop when the frequency is down to less than once every two weeks. So my gut was pretty close.