7 Things I Wish I Had Known About Finding Out I Was Pregnant
Real talk here, ladies: It isn’t all sunshine, rainbows, and unicorn-emblazoned onesies when you first find out you’re pregnant. In addition to the strange physical side effects you start experiencing shortly after your big fat positive, there are some seriously weird — and seriously conflicting — emotions that sometimes follow. And contrary to how anyone makes you feel: It’s perfectly okay.
Whether you had a long road trying to conceive or found yourself unexpectedly expecting, the feelings and emotions that accompany a positive pregnancy test may not be what you envisioned — and the reason most likely is because they’re not usually talked about.
Here are seven things no one tells you about finding out you’re pregnant. Who knew it was possible to feel so many things at once?!
1. You feel crampy. For many women, one of the first tell-tale signs of pregnancy is cramping. Ironically, this often happens early on, shortly after your missed period, so it can really throw you for a loop. For a lot of women, like What to Expect user tycooksey, feeling cramps at the start of pregnancy can be frightening. “My cramps weren’t super painful, but they definitely were scary,” she says. “I thought something was wrong but apparently it’s normal.” For others, like iheartcindy, cramps are the symptom that gives away pregnancy in the first place. “I feel really normal — except for some spotting and cramps. The cramps are actually what led me to take a pregnancy test in the first place,” she says. “The positive tests are hard to believe, because I don’t feel very pregnant!”
2. You might be afraid. Despite the fact that societal pressure can sometimes make women feel guilty if they feel anything but Pure! Joy! when they get pregnant, feeling scared is totally normal — and there are a variety of reasons you may feel this way. “I wasn’t expecting to be more terrified than excited when I found out I was pregnant, even though we were actively trying,” says mama coco. “My gut reaction, after being diagnosed with PCOS 16 years ago, was: ‘That was too easy, it probably isn’t going to stick.’ I spent those first weeks looking for blood every single time I went to the bathroom and agonizing over every twinge.” Kmcef had similar emotions, but for different reasons. “I immediately felt anxiety and worry when I found out I was pregnant,” she says. “I was expecting the happiness to outweigh the fear, but I guess conflicting emotions are just part of life as a mom.”
3. You might not know how you feel. For women who find themselves pregnant shortly after a loss, the emotions can be extra complicated. “I had a rollercoaster of emotions when I found out I was expecting,” lwhit011 reveals. “I had just had my fourth miscarriage less than two months earlier. I was still grieving the loss of my baby, the first to ever have a confirmed heartbeat. I was in shock. I went home and cried my eyes out grieving my loss all over again. I think it was the most I let myself grieve since our first miscarriage. But after that day, I was able to focus on my current pregnancy and take care of myself.”
Mom-to-be Shauna2086 found herself in a similar situation. “I feel scared,” she says. “We had a loss recently and when the two pink lines showed up so quick this time, I cried. Not those happy excited tears. The fear tears. I know I’m not prepared for another loss. Everyday that passes, I start to slowly let myself believe the lines.”
4. You feel impatient. Save for some cramping and possibly morning sickness, you don’t always feel pregnant when you first find out you’re expecting — and it can make a mama-to-be a little impatient for the “fun” things like telling friends, going to the doctor, and having a cute little bump. “I was surprised at how long it took for my first doctor’s appointment after finding out I was pregnant,” inkedmom252 notes. “Eight to 10 weeks before seeing your doctor or getting your first ultrasound!! What?!” JenP1986 echoes that sentiment, saying, “I can’t believe how long you have to wait for your first appointment! My anxiety is driving me nuts! All I do is wonder if everything is going [okay] in there!”
5. You start Googling. Ah, Google. There really isn’t a situation in life that doesn’t call for it, but the searching kicks into overdrive for most moms when they find out they’re pregnant. “My Google searches immediately changed when I found out I was expecting,” notes CourtneyJudy. “And drastically!” That said, keep in mind that there is such a thing as too much Googling — especially when you’re pregnant.
6. The initial pregnancy symptoms aren’t fun. Sadly, women aren’t immediately blessed with glowing skin, glossy hair, and a cute little baby bump when they first become pregnant — and until then, it can be a heck of a road. For some, like erica.chavie, an early pregnancy side effect is feeling “hot all the time,” while others wind up feeling incredible bloated. “No one tells you how much you’ll end up bloating!” mrsp-123 says. “I’m not even seven weeks along and look like I’ve entered my second trimester!” And some unlucky women get hit with the gift of an ultra-sensitive sniffer right away. “My sense of smell was like a superpower shortly after I found out I was pregnant,” reveals TessiesBB.
7. You’re exhausted. No...exhausted. You may have heard just how tired pregnant women can feel, but when you experience it firsthand, it’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before. “I’m surprised by the absolute exhaustion I feel right now,”caramhovan says.“Actually one of my first little signs of hope for being pregnant was that I didn’t get a huge surge of energy a day or two before my period, like I normally do. I’m only five weeks, but good heavens, am I in a constant state of sleepiness!”