Fat People Have Amazing Sex Lives Too
Fat people weighed in on sex and relationships when you live in a fat body. Here is a glimpse of what some of us had to say.
1. We can’t stand all the myths and misconceptions about fat bodies and fat sex.
“The first misconception that comes to mind is that sex with a fat person is less enjoyable than sex with a thin person. Not only is it not true, it’s just one more way people demonize fat bodies and try to take away our value as sexual/romantic partners and our right to (consensually) touch and be touched for pleasure.” — Jocelyn B.
“I think people think that my standards for partners are lower, or that my standards should be lower because I should take whatever I can get.” — Maria S.
“When I was young, I heard some guys I knew joking that fat girls are easy because they are so desperate for attention that they will do almost anything (and anyone.) I think a lot of people carry those juvenile beliefs into adulthood.” — Carla G.
“We don’t smell. That’s ridiculous and not fat-specific! Any human being with poor hygiene could have an unpleasant odor, and anyone with good hygiene can smell just fine. Fat people are just people, and the same rules apply.” — Kara C.
2. Sex with us is not boring or cumbersome. Like, at all.
“My husband is easily able to move me around in bed. We don’t have to think about how heavy I might be, and we don’t have to make any adjustments to allow for my body. I know he’s never uncomfortable because if he was, he’d just pick me up and move me wherever he wanted me.” — Keira C.
“My partner is otherwise rather reserved, but he recently asked to bring a can of whipped cream into the bedroom. Seeing how thoroughly he enjoyed himself whilst having me for dessert was quite nice!” — Reagan S.
“My wife is genuinely in love with me — all of me. She’s introduced me to sexual experiences I had never tried before. Seeing her excitement because of my excitement is hot.” — Jamie L. S.
3. We have no problem finding partners in person or online.
“About four and a half years ago, I put myself out there on some dating sites. There were plenty of creeps, but there were also some genuinely awesome people. My size never really became an issue. Long story short, I met my partner through an online dating site, and we’ve been together almost 4 years now.” — Sandra W.
4. Our partners aren’t exclusively attracted to fat bodies, but they also don’t wish we were thin.
“Some people believe if a fat person is in a relationship with a smaller person, it’s because the smaller person has an undisclosed fetish or exclusive attraction to a fat body, regardless of the person inside. That’s bullshit. Being attracted to us is not outside of the sexual norm. The idea that we wouldn’t be able to tell if our partners have an unhealthy obsession with fat people insinuates that we are constantly being played by people incapable of truly loving us, but we are too dumb or desperate to recognize it.” — Kelli G.